Taking control: What to do when joy and happiness is inaccessible!

Before you knew the meaning of a goal, you had a general view that you wanted to be happy; and that happiness will come as a result of purposely doing something to achieve it.  It is therefore an inborn desire to tirelessly seek until you find it.

General perception of joy and happiness!

Happiness is a positive emotional state and is not necessarily depended on other factors such as money or other material possession.  Joy is a lifestyle of continued state of happiness.  It is an attitude of choosing positive thoughts, words and actions which support and promote positive feelings.  It is for this reason that after the euphoria of fame for instance, the state of unhappiness will rear its ugly face and declare your need for professional help.  This demonstrates that joy and happiness are inclined to inward self determination than being responsive to good things that cause incidental positive emotion. 

What to do to access joy and happiness!

Often you look outside when you feel unhappy.  This is the first mistake which will set you up to fail repeatedly because your happiness and joy comes from within self.  When you do not get this right, you will set out to find something or someone who could make you happy.  If you are unhappy, you will carry your unhappiness with you into any relationship and environment – family, job, fitness club, even the church.  A tendency is to put all blame on the other party; yet you had your emotional issues which are still there regardless of other people’s attempts to meet you halfway by ignoring your controlling or manipulative behavior.  This means you need to know and internalize the truth; that if you carry a bad energy, it will ruin all things you become part of.  So, the remedy lies within you!  Let us consider the following:

1.      The law of love: The law of love is spiritual and says – Love your Creator first and love others as yourself.   It is easy to love your Creator because you can look at things He has given you – life, health, provision of things you need and could not produce without His assistance like high intellect, healthy babies, etc.  It is easy to love yourself; but it is challenging to love others unconditionally.

2.      The significance of loving others:  A law is binding and applies in all circumstances.  For an example; if your mother in-law hates you, you will likely be challenged to love her; and that will violate the law of loving others as yourself. Let me explain; you love yourself all the time – when you have done good things and when you made mistakes because your ego will surely reason it out and water-down your responsibility to love unlovable people who caused the conflict.  When you retaliate for any injustice, it does not tally with loving unconditionally.  In such incidents you are required to revisit the issue and consciously choose to forgive from your heart; meaning feeling joy as you let go hurting emotions. 

3.      Forgiveness leads to happiness and joy: The key to experiencing happiness and joy is forgiving all people who inflicted emotional pain.  It is also one of the key factors of attaining good health and access to wealth. If you read the Bible, God requires that you make peace with your brother before you approach Him about giving thanks and appreciation to Him.  This is hard but it is a law which opens doors for your happiness and joy.

The cost of experiencing joy and happiness is choosing not to harbor any negative emotion even if you have not provoked the other person.  In other words there is no excuse for not forgiving those who hurt you.  Successful maintenance of this virtue denotes spiritual maturity.  It is all about taking control of your life!