Create-a-new life!

Sunday, 28 February 2016

Taking control: Benefits of positive self-talk!

Affirm your wisdom and freedom aloud....!
Conscious self-talking is a way of tapping into your subconscious mind where your intelligence and all life experiences have been stored. It is a natural way which clearly indicates that your spiritual self functions in a different realm from physical and social self.

 What is self-talk?
Self talk denotes speaking out aloud as if talking to another person yet you are addressing self. Self talk is a normal brain function which occurs when doing a challenging task or something you like wherein you verbalize your feelings. Self-talk is referred to as a private talk because it is really meant for your own ears only and in most cases it is about something you would not want anybody to hear.

Benefits of positive self-talk!
Self-talk is as normal as breathing. Unlike children who indulge in self talk most of the time, adults prefer to keep it inside and unleash this need in privacy probably for fear that they will be regarded as insane. The following are benefits of self talk:
1.   It is ideal affirmation tool: Most people seeking positive change do so through repeating positive statements of intent for the purpose of committing to the desired change. For an example, if you are reviewing the events of the day and recall that you kept your good idea because you were intimidated by the presence of someone you look up to and regard as more intelligent, you would benefit and change if you could at that point remind yourself that you are unique and that your view would have been appreciated and regarded as fresh by the same person you admire. This is when you need to remind yourself that wisdom is never from outside but within you.

2.   It is ‘Me time’ companion: Whenever you are alone; especially taking a bath, it is ideal time to verbalize your appreciation of resources at hand: For an example, appreciate water because all things including you thrive from water. Water is a life source and many 
Be not ashamed of seeking power within is liberating! 
experiments indicate its reciprocation of positive energy. This denotes that every time you say ‘thank you’ for accessing and using water you are doing yourself a great honor of activating the benefits of water on and in you. ‘Me Time’ is a therapeutic session of reactivating a positive energy in and around you through self talk. For an example, it is time to complement yourself for the good performance for your job, powerful article you wrote for your blog and tasty meal you prepared for your family. It is time to show self some love by reassuring yourself and becoming unashamedly excited about it.

3.   Regarded and accepted as expression of positive thinking: All ideas originate from the mind and are processed and spoken to convey the message. You are probably aware that your mind thinks and talks differently from your spirit self. For an example, your spirit may remind you of the charity campaign and gently urges you to contribute. Your mind is likely to come up with a logic stuff which dissuades you from further contravening your idea of saving for a new car.  The internal argument will likely take a second phase of showing that giving will attract positive events, environment and ideas which will accelerate your goal of buying a new car. You end up saying aloud; ‘my ten dollar will make a difference to someone who has no food and I can save ten dollar of my lunch to cover that!’ There you are! Excited and all smiles and spend the rest of the day overjoyed and at peace!

Self-talk is allowing self to tap into internal wisdom for counsel. It is indulging in childhood practice of verbalizing your thoughts to clarify the idea to self, assure self with an attempt to console and externalizing compassion to self. It is a liberating approach in learning about self. Self talk is likely to occur whenever you face a serious life changing decisions of taking control of your life.     

Monday, 22 February 2016

Taking control: The impact of anger on self and relationships!

Anger and love cannot occupy one space...!

Anger is a strong emotion that a person experience as a result of various negative factors over a period of time or isolated incidents. It is a display of a negative energy caused by reaction to situation or other people.

Underlying causes of anger!
Mankind is a social being and learns from cultural and societal norms throughout various developmental stages. During socialization, a child could be exposed to negative environment or be subjected to unpleasant situation which was filed by the subconscious mind. In childhood a child also experience situations that violates physical and or emotional security and normally is repressed over a period. In adulthood all accumulated negative experiences manifest in various forms of negative emotions that is caused by overstretched efforts to control the feelings of anger.  Other contributing factors to anger are as follows:
1.   The modern fast life get most of us feel pressure over routine tasks and often we experience stress before we reach our work place due traffic issues and other incidentals. We eat fast food that does not support our immune system and multi-task to earn more money to cope with the expensive lifestyle of big cities. A child raised by a stressed care-giver will be a victim of physical or emotional abuse and will perpetuate the vicious cycle of angry generation.
2.   Money is a common problem to a larger percentage of the society and is the main cause of angry episodes in most families.
3.   Abused person suffer repressed anger and will impart this negative energy to the loved ones in more than one way: Genetics tend to be an issue which presently cannot be weeded out. Children living in a constant angry environment will learn that behavior and will realize only later in life that they must unlearn such negativism. 
Types of anger and their impact on relationships!
Anger could be passive or aggressive. Passive anger is subtle and manifest in sarcasm or mean behavior. Such people are not able to talk to others without injecting a sting that leaves the other person perplex and wondering if they said or did something to arouse such undertone unpleasantness.
Victims of anger suffer heart diseases!
Aggressive anger is explosive and often freezes other people to refrain from confronting such an angry person. Unless one is enlightened and therefore not easily affected by such negativism, a normal person would not want to have anything to do with such a person in terms of seeking a close relationship.

How anger destroy relationships!
Anger and love cannot occupy one space. An angry person struggles to display love because the other person will still feel the undercurrent of negativism. A person with anger issues is often seeking an upper hand and therefore seen as controlling or manipulating.  Regardless of gender, in a relationship a couple have to communicate about personal background, career prospects, short and long term goals and how they will raise their children. This is a serious talk that requires free will and openness for both parties to really hear and understand each other. Often such talk will be half done because the angry party will respond aggressively to simple question and for peace’s sake the other party will abandon the talk. Evidently, such a relationship is a non-starter; it will struggle and then die a natural death. 

The long-term impact of anger on your health is serious. Those who are suffering from anger will eventually experience health issues like stroke, serious memory loss and chronic sleep disorder. Anger is a learned behavior and can be reversed through counseling and other therapies including self-help practices like yoga.  Education about anger will enable sufferers to know that the first step is identifying and acknowledging a problem and then seek help to be able to maintain future healthy relationships.

Monday, 15 February 2016

Taking control: Tips for finding an ideal partner!

Changing features of love is ideal...!


There are two types of approaches in finding an ideal partner: trusting that destiny will eventually pair you with an ideal partner or being proactive in positioning yourself in a suitable environment for the type of a partner you have in mind.


Ideal partner defined!

An ideal partner is a person who understands the basic of an intimate relationship: Firstly, making effort to know you so that he or she can make tentative decision in allowing the next levels of the relationship. Secondly, naturally share a personal vision during initial stage of dating and openly express expectation for your support. Thirdly, allows open disclosure about personal information and is ready to be vulnerable in all respect. And most importantly knows that there will be important aspects of life that seek mutual compromises.


Tips for finding an ideal partner!

Most African communities do not allow ladies to aggressively seek an intimate partner; it is qualified as inappropriate and indicative of morally low standards.  This means that an African lady must be sought and pursued and most importantly never display mutual attraction to a prospective partner. Fortunately this moral principle is becoming obsolete. Personally I regard seeking a partner as a very important mission and therefore require proactive approach as follows:


1.       Honesty: Listen with your heart and allow your intuition to assist you to determine the level of honesty during initial meetings. Naturally, a human body knows the truth and this is why a lying person has work hard to maintain normal non-verbal cues.

2.       Mutual respect: Disrespect tends to slip; it is therefore one of the difficult flaws to cover. Often it is regarded as important because if you tolerate it at initial stage, you are giving the other person a permission to emotionally abuse you.

3.       Good communication: It denotes open two way communication, which is not condescending or challenge academic background. If any party intentionally continue with a subject that is not familiar to you and as a result create a one way conversation, it should be regarded as a red flag which says the other party enjoys the spot light situations.

4.       Trust: It develops from the continued application of honesty, mutual respect and communication.

5.       Vulnerability: Is a genuine display of trust which allows self to be at normal state of behavior.

6.       Separate identity: Is being aware of the differences of personal goals and career prospects. It is one of the deciding factors in the sense that it refrains any party  from controlling or manipulating the other party by trying to amend or express opinion in a suggestive manner; thus influencing the other party to modify his or her views.   


Finding an ideal partner is a challenging quest; one that should feel right to self and not to

any person or cultural traits system.  A lady may not be free to approach a gentleman, but there is nothing wrong to reciprocate interest.  Actually a lady must position herself to meet as many male people as possible by frequenting places like hardware store or fitness clubs.   Taking control of your life is being proactive in accessing something that you need because  when it is done, you would have achieved one of the most important personal goals.




















Sunday, 7 February 2016

Taking control: A formula for success is self-empowerment!

It starts with your decision to find who you are...!

A formula is a blueprint; a tested procedure to do something which could be adopted as a principle that can be applied for the predetermined results.  All people seek success and since we all are differently gifted, it has to point to individuality of mankind.

Success defined!
Success is subjective since it is aligned to the achievement of personal goals which are relative to individual person in the context of own perception of optimum life. It is therefore a relative milestone of reaching the top which could be a hill or a mountain depending on individuals understanding of success.

Formula for success!
Learning about self is a great adventure;
you owe it to yourself! 
Education changes behavior. We all experienced varying degree of poor informal education that was probably based on cultural restrictions due to level of knowledge of those who laid foundational blocks of intellectual and spiritual development. On the basis of this fact, it should be normal for all people to verify own perception of success and therefore seek to reconfigure self through non-formal and formal education. Knowledge of own power, courage and faith are learned and the process transcends the grave as follows:

1.   Knowledge of own power: Until you cut loose any learned hurdles, you will always confess some things as impossible for you. The sad truth is that whatever you confess is the product of your thoughts and feelings and will surely come to pass. Knowing self is discovering your true self; your spirituality, where your wisdom is. The challenge is discovering self at this realm and believing your connectivity with the Creator Who is omnipotent.

2.   Courage to explore your world: Until you erase the limitation associated with your lineage such as your social background which you experienced as poor or below average in terms of intellectual capability, you will set your limits accordingly. On the other hand if you focus on your individuality, you courage will grow steadily and will propel you to  achieve anything according to your given social and spiritual gifts.

3.   Faith in your ability to follow your heart: The Creator says it is impossible to please Him without faith. I believe it is also impossible to please yourself without faith because you cannot give what you do not have and what you have you must believe in, feel success before it manifests. Faith is the most challenging spiritual component of success. Those who ushered mankind from stone age to high technology refused to give up on unheard-of innovations they conceived in their minds; they believed in their ideas and each step was a discovery in their ability to bring their vision to pass.  In other words faith is a decision to focus on a particular mission until accomplished.

Success requires you to acquire knowledge about that which you want; keeping your motivation alive through affirmation and focusing on the end result. It is for this reason that the Creator says when you ask Him for anything you have to believe that you already have it. Your feelings of joy and excitement are the energy that will increase the momentum of the law of attraction to bring success into your experience. As you take control of your life this year, I encourage you to be determined to learn the law of love which is the law of attraction for success.

Monday, 1 February 2016

Taking control: Why starting-over requires renewing the mind!

You need transformation to attain optimal life. It starts with the mind...!
Every twelve months most people review their progress in achieving their life purpose. Such review will reveal mistakes which require a person to adopt new strategies. The formula for success says if you want a changed life you must change how you think first.

Why start-over?
Starting-over means going back to the starting point of the idea or task and review all steps and strategies applied in order to identify flaws that led to failure or delays in attaining the perceived goals. It is an opportunity to apply remedial measures that requires a new way of thinking and learning to adhere to principles of the natural laws such as the law of attraction as well as applying appropriate empowerment tools.

How to renew the mind!
Renewing the mind is a result of self empowerment on factors that lead to success. It is said that learning changes behavior and it is therefore mandatory for success in whatever you determine to achieve. You cannot access something you are not aware of because all things originate in the mind as an idea and come into existence as a result of natural law of cause and effect. In other words because something was perceived first in the mind it must come to pass in fulfillment of the law of attraction. You cannot experience anything that has not been part of your thinking and feeling. It is for this reason that for you to experience things you want, you must first change how you think by focusing only on those things you want.  

The key factor in renewing the mind is to be aware of what is going on in your mind and learn to cancel any undesirable thought immediately. Starting over requires you to be aware of this concept and know it to be true whether you understand it or not in order to stay focus on what you want.  Starting-over requires you to apply the concept of ‘Now’ which simply denotes that you must become aware of why your thoughts are dwelling on a particular idea or thought so that you purposely cause that idea or thought to manifest.

Benefits of renewed mind!
Before you lead anyone you need to conquer your mind...
In the context of starting-over, a renewed mind will accelerate your momentum of changed life as follows:
1.   Support your motivation to improve your life. Starting-over is a decision to change the current conditions of your life in one or three aspects of your life; relationships, health and wealth.
2.   Reveal your life purpose by directing your thoughts within you in order to discover your purpose for your existence. When you have discovered your vision, renewing the mind will be a natural new and necessary mechanism for succeeding.
3.   Excitement and enthusiasm to learn and network with supporting resources: You will decide on whether you need a coach in your identified vision. You will feel energized to know why you are doing what you are doing and the key is to stay focused on the feeling of achievement.
4.   Starting-over is a form of spiritual awakening whereby you purposefully stir your life by creating your life experiences. When you experience this revelation of your most divine ability to create, you would have found a reason for your existence.

Most of us had to get lost before we realize that life does not happen to us but is the experience of our individual cause.  For me, starting-over is a natural repositioning of self to generate experiences that correlate with my vision. The power of now will enable you to create your experiences and cut any mental and emotional anchors that had cause you pain and failure most of your life. It is logical therefore to review how you have lived your life at this point. You can only start-over when you have a deep desire for change which you will attain by renewing your mind. That will be a point at which you have decided to take control of your life!