Create-a-new life!

Monday, 15 February 2016

Taking control: Tips for finding an ideal partner!

Changing features of love is ideal...!


There are two types of approaches in finding an ideal partner: trusting that destiny will eventually pair you with an ideal partner or being proactive in positioning yourself in a suitable environment for the type of a partner you have in mind.


Ideal partner defined!

An ideal partner is a person who understands the basic of an intimate relationship: Firstly, making effort to know you so that he or she can make tentative decision in allowing the next levels of the relationship. Secondly, naturally share a personal vision during initial stage of dating and openly express expectation for your support. Thirdly, allows open disclosure about personal information and is ready to be vulnerable in all respect. And most importantly knows that there will be important aspects of life that seek mutual compromises.


Tips for finding an ideal partner!

Most African communities do not allow ladies to aggressively seek an intimate partner; it is qualified as inappropriate and indicative of morally low standards.  This means that an African lady must be sought and pursued and most importantly never display mutual attraction to a prospective partner. Fortunately this moral principle is becoming obsolete. Personally I regard seeking a partner as a very important mission and therefore require proactive approach as follows:


1.       Honesty: Listen with your heart and allow your intuition to assist you to determine the level of honesty during initial meetings. Naturally, a human body knows the truth and this is why a lying person has work hard to maintain normal non-verbal cues.

2.       Mutual respect: Disrespect tends to slip; it is therefore one of the difficult flaws to cover. Often it is regarded as important because if you tolerate it at initial stage, you are giving the other person a permission to emotionally abuse you.

3.       Good communication: It denotes open two way communication, which is not condescending or challenge academic background. If any party intentionally continue with a subject that is not familiar to you and as a result create a one way conversation, it should be regarded as a red flag which says the other party enjoys the spot light situations.

4.       Trust: It develops from the continued application of honesty, mutual respect and communication.

5.       Vulnerability: Is a genuine display of trust which allows self to be at normal state of behavior.

6.       Separate identity: Is being aware of the differences of personal goals and career prospects. It is one of the deciding factors in the sense that it refrains any party  from controlling or manipulating the other party by trying to amend or express opinion in a suggestive manner; thus influencing the other party to modify his or her views.   


Finding an ideal partner is a challenging quest; one that should feel right to self and not to

any person or cultural traits system.  A lady may not be free to approach a gentleman, but there is nothing wrong to reciprocate interest.  Actually a lady must position herself to meet as many male people as possible by frequenting places like hardware store or fitness clubs.   Taking control of your life is being proactive in accessing something that you need because  when it is done, you would have achieved one of the most important personal goals.