Create-a-new life!

Wednesday, 22 April 2015

Taking control: Learn how to overcome anger and other negative emotions!


Negative emotion is a mental response to environment which does not tally with your beliefs and values systems instilled through the socialization process. All people have accumulated a varying degree of unpleasant experiences from words and actions used to teach or correct behavior.
Anger defined!
Anger is a learned physical and mental emotion accumulated throughout life, displaying a biological stimulation of the body to fight or run in preservation of self.  In its degree of severity, it could be subtle resentment, it could lead a person to raise the voice, pound the hand/fist on objects and physically attack the source or victim.
Contributing factors to anger and other negative emotions!
Anger is a common emotional baggage which could begin before conception, be experienced at conception, during pregnancy and throughout the foundational years of childhood and adult life. The following depicts the contributing factors to anger and other negative emotions:
1.    Before conception: Parenting occurs before conception. If the mother did not fully agree on starting a family because she was working towards a promotion to executive position, compliance would not rule out subtle resentment and anger for compromised personal goal; and that would affect a baby. It is said that the sperm would experience resistance when trying to penetrate the egg.
2.    Pregnancy and childhood: Anger and other negative emotion such as fear due to financial lack do affect the mother and the baby. Repressed anger is common and do find outlets later in adult life. In most cases it manifest through continual attempt to numb the pain through alcohol and other substances.
3.    Poor socialization: As indicated above, socialization starts before conception and requires continual empowerment of social, economic and spiritual knowledge and skills. The ideal approach of empowerment is allowing learning through self experiences with guidelines and not coercion or compliance by fear. Most parents transfer their own experiences of childhood and add some or any logic that may resemble purposeful impartation of knowledge and skills.  A child learns by watching parents and others; this implies that exposure to undesirable environment is harmful. Emotional abuse is common when parents lack knowledge on what it is, and its impact on the child’s self esteem. Most of us had to learn to regain our self-worth to be able to access job market, pursue career, engage in and manage relationships.
How to overcome anger and other emotions!
When you are aware of your anger triggers, you have the first key that will unlock the inner you and face the challenge through various anger management techniques.  You are on your way to reclaiming control of your life because you can only change what you have identified as undesirable.  The following techniques will assist you to not be controlled by your emotions:
1.    Abort negative thoughts: Anger is a manifestation of negative thoughts. The key is watching the quality of your thoughts. The Creators advise us to meditate on His Word – fix your thoughts on what is noble, pure, lovely and praise-worthy.  Choose to forgive immediately.
2.    Breath and count to ten: If you flip to the next stage – feeling anger brewing inside you, look at it and identify its color and watch it without judging. This shift of attention into your ability and intention to maintain peace and joy will immediately reduce the building up process. Remember you are not your mind and therefore can watch the scene as a separate being. This simple act of taking in fresh air though your nostrils will enable you to watch your anger without participating in it.   Watching it gives you power to reduce its velocity and will enable you to respond and not react to the incident.
3.    Engage in physical activity: If you have fitness equipment engage in exercises; if not find something to do like cleaning the floor, walls, cupboards. This will cause your body to produce happy hormones that will offset the fight or run hormones.
4.    Be conscious about the tense muscles and relax your shoulders while breathing deeply:  When anger sets in, your body prepares to fight or run. It pours in adrenalins into your system for increased strength.  The heart rate increases and other body functions are temporarily on hold because your brain has sent alert message for a crisis. Shift your thoughts by focusing on any picture that will neutralize this state. I normally sing or pray in the spirit and move away from the scene. Unmanaged ager will eventually result in the following health issues:
·        High blood pressure
·        Stroke
·        Coronary conditions
·        Digestive issues which may lead to cancer
·        Lowered immune system which leads to colds, flu and other health conditions.
If you sit and ask yourself if there is any reason to allow anger to ruin your life, you will have recognized the need to overcome the tendency to let circumstances disrupt your environment. Indulging in anger means allowing negative emotions to influence your life because you are not fully conscious; that is, you have given up your choice to lifestyle that supports holistic wellness.