Life is a lot complex when you
are planning to partner with somebody in a binding marital contract because you
really must find someone who loves you enough to bend his/her beliefs and
values. Sacrificial compromise must be
acknowledged as evidence of unconditional love and not a weakness.
Compromise
defined
A compromise is being able to
allow and accept lower than expected concession on something through open
communication. It is noting and being mature about the fact that each person is
an individual and very different from you and therefore cannot see the world
according to your perception. Compromise enables people to tolerate each other and
co-exist in various social institutions.
Five
subjects you must apply wise compromise
You are an individual and have
likes and dislikes. Nonetheless, you
learn to forfeit your right to full satisfaction as you go through various
developmental stages. The most
significant compromises occur when you decide to bring another person into your
life under the marital contract. It becomes complex because marriage is
designed by God and has His rules. From the social perspective though, compromise
has been a subject of much debate under the banner of human rights. Huge documents were drawn and governments have
to enforce them. Nonetheless as you plan
to bring someone into your life you need to consider the following before you
tie the knot:
1.
Spirituality: You are a spirit being with a soul living in a body. The issues of
spirituality therefore are of utmost importance. If you are a Christian, you better marry a Christian;
life will be less complicated when you worship your Maker! Even if you fall for
somebody outside your religion, you must sober up and internalize how many
compromises you are willing to meet for the rest of your life!
2.
Political affiliation: This is one subject you are likely to tiptoe around hoping to make it
insignificant. It is not; and could be disastrous! Imagine these: you and your
spouse watching current affairs and unable to discuss issues for fear of arguing?
Think about that! Remember; parents are role models and children emulate them. Political
affiliation compromise could be hard to meet.
3.
Your career: After a lot of hard work you are finally an engineer and you work away from home.
Would you find somebody who will compromise and accommodate your work
conditions? Remember your career is your
life; so is your spouse’s career! From spiritual point of view, a wife simply
comply to all circumstances; but from human right perspective, how far do you
expect another person to forfeit their own personal goals for yours?
4.
Number of children: Agreeing to a specific number of children is an honorable compromise. Social roles make a mother more responsible
to feed and nurture an infant. On the other hand, it is expected that you as a
father must provide for the family. How prepared are you to share your wife
with your child? Remember a child has selfish reflexes of needing attention now
and will learn about the delayed gratification principle later in life. A child
also will become another factor of compromise when considering migrating to
another country for higher paying job if that will disrupt schooling program.
5. How You Spend Your Money: You work to meet your needs and wants. Without a spouse you probably change
cars every year though you live in a rented bachelor apartment. You also shop designers’ clothes and enjoy
eating out. All these are likely to change to accommodate your partner’s needs
and wants apart from saving money for the number of children you purposed and
are convinced will make you happy. This requires a huge compromise and
psychological preparedness.
In relationships compromises
are essential and are permanent conditions that make life bearable in all
social institutions. They are a basis on which, a person willingly experience
less of the available resources in order to accommodate the likes and dislike
of others. Compromises distinguish mankind as a social as well as a moral being;
they assist in upholding a social justice.
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